You are using an outdated browser.
Please upgrade your browser
and improve your visit to our site.

Paging Josh Marshall

Onionall too plausibly
Shaking Off Amnesia, Gonzales Remembers He's Actually Pool Salesman From Tulsa

Embattled Attorney General Alberto Gonzales' future was thrown further into jeopardy Friday when he was accidentally struck by a boom microphone, reversing a years-long case of amnesia and causing him to remember his true identity as hotshot Tulsa, OK pool and spa salesman "Cabana Al" Gonzales.

"My God, what am I doing here?" a dazed Gonzales asked reporters in what they assured him was indeed his office. "The last thing I remember is slipping on some wet redwood decking out by the Boswicks' 16-by-48-foot in-ground El Tropico--beautiful pool...."

"Clearly, I should not be seventh in line for the presidency," Gonzales said. "Can I go home now?"
Michael Crowley